Monday, July 17, 2017

Childhood Vaccinations Celebrity Deaths? by Jacob Worwa

One of the biggest subjects that the American people have been protesting about is childhood vaccinations and the effects they have on our children, and the pressing question is, are childhood vaccinations linked to celebrity deaths?

Many celebrities have died in 2016, such as Princess Leia, Willy Wonka, and the Goblin King. Another important issue that year was childhood vaccinations, which can only mean that the two subjects are related. Our top researchers at News of Super Federal Wimportance (NSFW) have proven their research as follows:

“When children are vaccinated, the autism in their lungs gathers. Whenever kids use their electronics, such as phones, they breathe their germy juvenile lung particles all over that technology, which transmits through communication to other phone users. And since celebrities are very social and must use technology everyday, the autism virus goes nearer to them more often, and therefore celebrities die a lot and a lot and a lot. Also, Trump has to be behind this somehow.”

Finally, every celebrity who was vaccinated or is vaccinated will die. The evidence is clearly there with irrefutable proof.

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